Oh boy. I just dumped a bucket of pig blood on my head with that one. But that’s good. It got your attention.
To clarify, the purpose of this article isn’t to promote slams against women or men – it’s only to ask an easy question. Before I posted this, I asked a few people to answer the same question I’m about to ask you.
Here’s the question:
Which one of these two statements if written online or spoken in person is likely to have a greater impact?
Female: “That guy’s such a douchebag.”
Male: “That woman’s such a bitch.”
Think about it.
Any person throwing an insult is trying to dominate another person. The words used during that argument are chosen because they will probably have an emotional effect on the other. And in a fight, the person who keeps their cool usually wins – the nastier the insult, the better the chance somebody will lose their head.
Bitch isn’t a nice word. It’s derogatory and you’d be hard-pressed to see it in print or in person without being flagged by somebody who finds it offensive. After all, that’s the whole point – it’s an attempt to demean, degrade, or devalue her from a gender standpoint. The point is to make her feel less than a man.
Now, go find me an article online where a male author refers to a woman as a bitch and is able to justify it in a way that his argument creates no friction among female readers.
You’ll probably have a hard time finding one.
That’s because bitch is a word that doesn’t fly under the radar.
On the flipside, the term douchebag is everywhere online. It’s an insult thrown at men portraying them as morons or idiots. It’s the inverse of bitch and it’s something that does fly under the radar. You’ll never find the same kind of outcry whenever it’s used and it’s something that’s almost always justified.
“Well he is a douchebag because he _____, ______, or ______.”
People give compelling arguments justifying a slam toward men, where as on the flip-side, a man can’t justify a derogatory remark about women. If a woman thinks a man is stupid, incapable, or if she feels she’s been slighted, he’s a douchebag.
Think about breakups: every ex-boyfriend is a douchebag. No ex-girlfriends are bitches. The same goes for Asshat, or Man-Child – both slams against men.
There’s never justification for calling a woman a bitch and the same goes for cunt or slut. None of these words are viewed as acceptable – regardless of the circumstances. It’s socially/culturally unacceptable. It’s all derogatory.
Women are entitled to judge or degrade the character of a man, but a man is not entitled to judge the character of a woman?
That’s a double standard.
I think guys are confused. Are you supposed to let it slide? It also seems like if a man does speak up about double standards or labels, it spins into a shame campaign; if men allow themselves to be degraded, the perceived value of men deteriorates.
Something to think about.